When You Stop Waiting to Be Understood.

You’ve tried to explain. The pain, the fatigue, the unpredictability. You’ve searched for the right words, hoping someone would finally get it.

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I used to bend over backwards trying to explain it.

The pain

The fatigue.

The way my body would just stop cooperating, like someone unplugged me from the inside out.

I thought that if I could just find the right words—if I could just describe it clearly enough—then maybe people would finally get it.

But they didn't.

Not when I missed events.

Not when I needed help with things I used to do on my own.

Not when I was barely hanging on and still pretending I was fine.

They didn't understand why I couldn't push through.

Why treatments failed.

Why I wasn't "better" yet.

And for a while, that broke me.

Because when people don't understand, you start questioning yourself.

When they doubt you, you starting doubting yourself too.

You wonder if maybe you're the problem. If maybe you're making it a bigger deal than it is.

And God, I wasted so much energy trying to make people see me.

I'd smile and nod when someone said, "You don't look sick".

I'd try to justify my limitations with logic and lab results.

I'd soften my truth because I didn't want to be too much.

But nothing changed.

So one day, I stopped.

Not because it didn't still hurt.

Not because I didn't still want to be seen.

But because I realized something that changed everything:

I don't need them to get it in order to keep going.

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They Can't Understand. And That's Okay

Here’s the truth I had to learn the hard way:

Most people won’t get it.

Not because they don’t care.

Not because they’re bad people.

But because they’ve never had to.

They’ve never had to question if they’ll have enough energy to shower and get dressed on the same day.

They’ve never had to grieve their body while still living in it.

They’ve never had to rebuild their identity from the inside out—because illness took the old one and shattered it.

So no, they won’t understand.

And you can exhaust yourself trying to make them.

Or you can stop needing them to.

That’s what I did.

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Peace begins the moment you stop needing anyone else to understand your path.

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You Don't Have to Be Understood to Move Forward

I used to think I needed validation in order to heal.

But what I needed was permission to stop waiting for it.

To stop shrinking myself into versions that were easier for people to digest.

To stop explaining my decisions just so people wouldn’t judge them.

To stop pretending that being misunderstood didn’t hurt—just so I could seem "strong."

Now?

I put my energy toward things that actually help me.

Creating structure when everything feels chaotic.

Being around people who see me without needing proof.

Spending less time explaining, and more time living—on my own terms.

It’s not about shutting people out.

It’s about deciding whose voices actually matter.

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You don’t need everyone to understand your path—just the courage to keep walking it.

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This Isn't Bitterness. It's Boundaries.

I don’t carry resentment toward the people who didn’t understand.

But I don’t bend for them anymore, either.

Because while they were confused by my limits…

I was over here building a life within them.

While they judged me for canceling plans…

I was trying to manage pain levels just to sit upright.

While they wondered if it was all in my head…

I was showing up for my life in ways they’ll never see.

I’ve stopped waiting to be understood.

And in doing that, I finally started to feel like myself again.

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It’s not resentment. It’s respect — for myself, my limits, and my healing.

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If This Hit You Somewhere Real...

If you're still trying to get the people around you to “get it,”

I see you. I’ve been there.

But let me tell you something I wish I knew sooner:

You don’t have to be understood to be valid.

You don’t have to be believed to start rebuilding.

You don’t need approval to live your life the way you need to.

If you’re tired of explaining yourself,

If you’re ready to focus on your own healing instead of everyone else’s opinions…

Let’s talk.

📅 Book a free strategy call here.

You deserve support that doesn’t ask you to prove anything.

Just someone in your corner who actually gets it.

💚

Samantha

Certified Life Coach | Lyme & Chronic Illness